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Uncategorized Wade Sarver

Be Clear on what You Don’t Want!

I often hear gurus telling us to be clear on what we want, our goals and so on. That seems like good advice but it has to be a SMART goal, more or less. 

  • S – Specific, as specific as you can be at the time, and it will change throughout the process.
  • M – Measurable meaning you can measure progress.
  • A – Achievable meaning you can actually do it or you’ve seem someone like you do it. If you’re in your late 50s and want to play in the NFL, that doesn’t seem achievable. However, you can invest, write, get healthy, change your lifestyle, or perhaps consider a new career, all of that is achievable in my opinion.
  • R – Relevant. Meaning it has to be something you’re interested in and have access to. If you live in Florida and want to be an ice climbing expert, you have to move or change your plans. Face it,that’s not relevant in Florida.
  • T – Time bound, meaning you have to have milestones with a deadline. Like I want to lose 100 lbs in 1 year. Then break it down to lose 10 lbs a month for a year, giving yourself some room for failure. I am not saying this is realistic, after all, I weigh 150 lbs today, if I lost 100 lbs I would weigh 50 lbs and probably be dead. 

However, no one ever tells you to be clear on what you don’t want. An anti-goal if you will. Your anti-goal can be anything you don’t want. 

For instance, I want to make a million dollars in 3 years. Simple, yet there are a lot of issues. How? Doing what? What are you willing to do and not do? I want to make a million dollars in 3 years by investing and not missing out on my family’s special events. 

Define what you don’t want. I wish I would have done this more often in my life. I often gave up too much for my goal and I didn’t realize what I missed until it was too late. I was an idiot. You, on the other hand, have the opportunity to do things right by aligning what you want with what you don’t want. 

If you don’t want to miss your children growing up, then say that out loud and remind yourself of that. Don’t get me wrong, you still need to earn a living, so there has to be balance. 

Being clear helps you decide what you want in life but also what you don’t want. 

You see, with me, I often put what I wanted in front of me and never thought about what I didn’t want. That caused me a lot of pain in my life. I would like to see you avoid the mistakes I made.

To be happy, it’s not always getting what you want, but avoiding what you don’t want. 

Trust me, in the long run it can be about what you didn’t do and what you avoided on purpose. Think it through. That’s all I ask.

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